Our Lady of the Pepperoni Pizza (no anchovies)

A cafeteria worker at an elementary school was cleaning a pizza pan when she discovered a stain that was resisting her efforts. Suddenly the Virgin Mary appeared before her eyes. Well, actually a stain appeared on the pizza pan. But having been taught by Father Sanchez that a good Catholic should never miss a chance to jump to a preposterous conclusion Guadalupe Rodriguez decided it was a miracle.

Obviously the Holy Mother of God likes pizza, but in a dream it was revealed that she does not like anchovies. They remind her of yeast infections in her Holy Virginal Genitalia.

How exactly does a baby pass through the birth canal if a lady still has an intact hymen? Wait, let me guess, I’m getting warmer, could it be A MIRACLE?

So next time you order a pizza to place as an offering before a graven image in your local Holy Roman Catholic Church, remember hold the anchovies.

Besides, her son can create fish on the spot if she changes her mind.

How come nobody ever sees an apparition of a parish priest molesting a child?

[tags]pareidolia, Virgin Mary, anchovies, priest, mass hysteria, pizza[/tags]

One Response to “Our Lady of the Pepperoni Pizza (no anchovies)”

  1. ernesto Says:

    This article is filthy, disgusting and in very poor taste.

    I loved it.

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