Our Lady of the Painful Looking Road Rash

Posted on May 7th, 2008 by Ungodly.
Categories: Amazingly Dumb Sightings, New Sightings, Really Lame Sightings, Road Rash.

In California USA a motorcyclist recently had an incident of premature contact with the road surface, a well known hazard for motorcyclists. Our Lady of the Painful Looking Road Rash But Marc Lipton, a gentleman who is apparently afflicted with religious beliefs, is of the opinion that he can see The Holy Virgin Mary Mother of God With Perfectly Intact hymen in the road rash on his leg.

It sure looks painful to me, and we're glad Mr Lipton was not hurt more seriously when his bike went down. But, ahem, well Mr Lipton we have seen other hallucinations in which the intact hymen was easier to see. There are many people, no doubt young ones among them, who search the internet day and night for hymen photos, hymen drawings, and hymen information - and who better to illustrate the beauty of the human reproductive system then the Mommy of God! But this particular hallucination may not measure up to a grilled cheese sandwich, or the potato from Riverside CA hymen viewing levels.

With her never once took it intact Hymen, even after she was married, except for just that one time when God raped her while she was just an underaged minor child, she mostly, except for the rape, is a virgin. And oh yeah, her Son is God too. I'm not saying "Oh God is he cute" I'm saying the Big Guy, the Head Cheese, the Top Banana, the Virgin God who Liked Guys, we are talking Jeebus here, people.

If your mother ran around town all the time bragging about being a virgin it might give you teh gay too.

We hardly expect all mothers to be virgins, and with Mother's Day fast approaching, and billions of wonderful mothers here on this planet, we wonder what the heck is all of this virginity stuff about? Hello, women are not sex toys made for the pleasure of domineering Austrian fathers. Women deserve respect, and mothers deserve even more respect. So why demean ordinary human mothers by suggesting that a Holy Virgin Mother with perfectly intact Hymen is somehow better? I just don't get it. Virginity is an inconvenience that can easily be remedied using a very pleasant and enjoyable procedure. I sure don't wish I still had my virginity, and if I got it back I'd try to lose it again ASAP.

So, really, whoop dee doo, so she never once took the whole thing. La dee da. I'm like, so impressed.

I hope he does not put his leg up on eBay.

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Other Marian Hallucinations:

  1. Our Lady of The Grilled Cheese Sandwich
  2. Our Lady of Yet Another Boring Tree Trunk
  3. Our Lady of the Birdshit on a Truck Rear View Mirror
  4. Our Lady of the Tree That Looks Just Like a Tree
  5. Our Lady of the Magnetic Resonance Imaging Scan

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