Virgin Mary (again)

Our Lady of the Storm Window Broken by a Rock

Posted on June 19th, 2009 by Ungodly.
Categories: Amazingly Dumb Sightings, Really Lame Sightings, chromatic aberrration sightings.

Some time ago a lawn mower propelled a rock which struck a window in the home of Greg and Debbie Sapp in Jesup, GA.

The rock damaged the outer glass of the dual pane window allowing the exchange of air and eventually creating a vagina-shaped mark on the inside of the window. It's a miracle! How else can you explain the fact that a stain much like other stains in other defective dual pane windows appeared in a roughly vagina shaped form at the home of a family already afflicted with preposterous ancient superstitions about a pregnant virgin giving birth to a son who made her pregnant and was his own son, his own dad, and let's not even think about the grandfather. God the Father, God the Son, God the Virgin Child Molester - patron saint of Catholic Priests.

Pareidolia is the psychological phenomenon that manifests itself in the strong tendency of the human mind to recognize shapes that are not there. In prehistoric times, when virgins seldom got pregnant or manifested themselves inside storm windows, it may have been very useful for human vision to be especially keen at recognizing the face of a tiger lurking behind that bush over there. So evolution may have favored those primates that were especially keen at quickly recognizing a familiar face, shape, or virgin bride who never once had a stiff, hard penis thrusting powerfully in and out of her hot, juicy love canal.

Seriously though, if you were the first one in your tribe to recognize a predator about to pounce you might have had better odds of living long enough to reproduce, thus giving your tendency to recognize vague shapes better odds of being passed on.

This does not mean that every time a human mind recognizes something familiar to their imagination in a nearby object that the face or shape recognized is really there. It does seem as though only people who think this imaginary ancient mother of a popular fictional character never took the whole thing - those folks are the ones who see her in defective window panes.

And it's nice when rational people have another good reason to ridicule preposterous ancient fairy tales. At least, we enjoy it. If the Virgin Mary gave some hot looking guy a really great blow job she would still be a virgin, right? It's all about a penis going into a vagina, which, makes me wonder why so many Catholic priests speak so highly of this innocent vagina-pure imaginary lady, I mean, she was never even an altar boy.

Technorati Tags: Virgin Mary, apparition, marian apparition, pure vagina, never took it, sacred blow jobs, defective windows, Pareidolia

2 comments.

Our Lady of the Chromatic Aberration on a Hospital Window

Posted on October 1st, 2008 by Ungodly.
Categories: Amazingly Dumb Sightings, New Sightings, Really Lame Sightings, chromatic aberrration sightings, defective reflection sightings.

Persons in Massachusetts who are arguably prone to hallucinations are reporting that they recognize the image of a Holy Virgin with Perfectly Intact Hymen (who never once took the whole thing) on a hospital window, despite the fact that none of the hallucinators have ever met or even seen a photograph of this alleged Perfect Hymen God Mommie, who may or may not have lived 2,000 years ago.

As the story goes, God raped his own underage teenage mother who was not old enough to consent to this out of wedlock act of fornication, then he got some poor sucker to marry her fast so she would not be stoned to death by her deity-obsessed tribe of genocidal warmongering persons of middle eastern descent. So God, who had sooper-seekrit voodoo sex with his own Mommy without penetrating her, made her pregnant with a bastard half breed baby that was part God, part dirty filthy human. But he *was* God, according to the story, so he was his own Daddy after somehow being born without disturbing his mom's perfectly intact hymen.

But back to this week's hallucination.

We find it interesting that the persons who recognize this obvious chromatic anomaly as a Virgin Mommy with Perfectly Intact Hymen seem to be, without exception, people who already suffer from the delusional belief that a virgin human gave birth to an Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy 2,000 years ago. I am, like, so sure.

Is it real? Or is it the psychological phenomenon known as Pareidolia? We write the sarcasm, you decide.

Technorati Tags: Virgin Mother, Intact Hymen, Marian Apparition, Pareidolia, Mass Hallucination, stupid religions, Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy, Massachusetts, Virgin with Intact Hymen

4 comments.